Desperate Writers, or Lazlo Toth Ventriloquism, Cont.

Dear Michael Eisner:

I wrote this "bookfraud" fellow about Disney and someone said you were a whore! I found out that you actually work at Disney and that Disney owns ABC. Why a company that runs Disney-Land and Disney-WORLD wants T.V., beats me. But Three's Company, The Man from U.N.C.L.E. and I Love Lucy are the all-time best! America's Broadcasting Company -- bravo Eisner!


America's CEO

I was mad that I had to pay $39.99 to go to Disney-Land because I didn't want to ride the rides, but you probably have more important things to worry about, like the Acadamy Awards. Can you have Bob Hope's clone host it this year?

Two suggestions:

1. Bring back Howard Cosell for Monday Nite Football. A true American!

2. Instead of Desperate Housewives, how about Desperate Chefs! It would be about the head chef at McDonalds. You could get Don Knotts to play the chef. Or the guy who plays Re-Run in What's Happening. I can write it for a small fee.

Also, could you bring back The Mod Squad, except make everyone white.

Keep it up! Support our President!

Sincerely,

Lazlo Toth